Just wait for it....

We picked Daddy up from the airport and I hear:

Daddy, I have some songs to sing for you.

Glenn: Do any of them have anything to do with bellybuttons?

Tay: No they don't.....but we'll get to that later.

Gimme that!

Commercial.

Go Go My Walking Pup comes on, all walking and stuff. And Tay says:

Ohhhh!!! I want that!

I look up. Oh dear heaven, not really? She doesn't play with that Creepy Cat she got for Christmas...besides Cat's and Dog's don't usually get along (wouldn't that be a kick, if Hasbro built that into the logic? Cat hisses, Dog barks and jumps snapping, Cat hisses. Dog wets itself.)

Tay says:

It won't poop.

I say: Uh huh I know.

She says: Or pee.

Long pause....

It won't poop or pee.

Seriously, I need that.

First Day of Kindergarten!

Tay has been extremely excited to go to Kindergarten, of course, she wants to skip it and go to 1st grade too. So, we got her all ready, she picked out her dress, I did her hair and we walked to the Bus Stop.

While we were there I took a half a million pictures or so and she POSED for almost all of them. When I say pose...I mean pose, not just stood still and put a hand on a hip, no no no, she pulled faces and everything. Well, see for yourself:


And we waited, but the bus was late. Uh Oh. Sign of things to come?



Eventually, she got on the bus and headed away to her first day of Kindergarten. I didn't cry, not even misty-eyed but I DID feel old. I know she is well adjusted to new things and anxious to be her own person. She told me, the night before, that I should NOT go with her to school. That I should NOT even think about it.

So I didn't.

But I still had to go to school and prove to them that she was all inoculated and indoctrinated and stuff. So I waited a half hour and then headed over.

When I got there, Darla said: I have a story for you.

I thought: 30 minutes and there are already stories? Oh dear heaven.

She said that Taylor came into the office and wasn't sure where her class was. There was a nice lady that was walking with her and Darla assumed it was Mom (she had forgotten who belonged with whom and they both did have blond hair). So, Darla tells Tay (thinking that Mom is listening too but wants to let Tay feel like she is a big girl and can take care of herself) that she is in room 156 and it's down this hall and to the left.

Tay says OK and walks out.

When the woman did not follow, Darla asked: Aren't you going to go with her?

The woman responded: Not her Mom.

So Darla and the Woman watch Tay walk down the hall and make the turn and saw that she had gotten almost to her classroom when her teacher walked out and they all made sure she got to class.

Darla said she was impressed that Tay was just very matter-of-fact about it and was completely confident she could do it on her own.

I said: Yeah, it sucks. :)

So Tay had an uneventful day, as far as I know, and Danny and I walked down to pick her up. The bus showed up:

But Tay did NOT get off.

I swore and walked back home to get my phone. I left Danny there in case she showed up and by the time I called the school and got into the car I saw them walking up the street. Dang it all I missed the shot of her getting off the bus. Well, out of the car will have to do:


She said she had a good time and showed me what she brought home. She also said she needed a backpack so we went, later, and bought one.

She is in Kindergarten now and her life is going to be a lot different. She will be opened up to new friendships, a world of information, cruelty, knowledge and I pray she will be strong enough to take it all in and use it to find her own path. She is already an amazing little girl and today is her first step in many she will take toward her personal development. We will encourage her and support her, while trying not to shield her. We will ensure that she has it easier than we did, because that's what parents do.

Have a great second day Tay! I love you!

Zombies!

Out of the blue:

Molotov's kill zombies.

Me: Molotov's? Really?

Yep, and there's also fire bombs. But don't watch me.

So I am not watching...I'm afraid of Molotov's.

Mom's Job

Nana bought Tay some walkie talkies. Not just any 'ol walkie talkies...these looked like little cell phones. Oh boy.

We were driving home from Nana's and Tay broke them out, handed me one and stated talking to me, from the backseat.

I hear all sorts of things and then she asks a question. I answer and she says:

Thanks for teaching me that.

I push the button and say: It's my job.

I hear:

No it isn't, your job is to boss us around.

Mom, it's warm.

We have problems with chocolate Popsicles. Tay loves them. She tried to eat them in lieu of other food so after I turned her down for the third time today because she didn't eat the prepared food she said:

OK.

????

She put it back and disappeared into my bedroom to watch Sponge Bob.

A few minutes later (commercial most likely) she comes in a says:

You know, Mom, it's warm. I am warm. (fans herself with her hand)

And Popsicles are really good at cooling you off.

I'm serious.

Apparently I was laughing out loud.

Food and Drink

We don't go to church much, it's tough with Bug. And unless you have met him, and spent a day with him, you would think it was a feeble excuse but it isn't. The last time we took him, he spent the time banging anything he could find on the back of the pew, when he wasn't doing that he was arching his back trying to get away and screaming at the top of his lungs. No comments, please, about just don't let him get away with it...we have no choice about it.

SO...we take Tay to church. She has been before but for some reason, she has gone dumb about it.

We are awaiting the sacrament and she says:

Hey! We get Food and Drink.

Me: Kinda. Be quiet.

After the bread she says:

When are they bringing the drink?

Me: In a minute...be quiet.

They bring the water...she looks at it, looks at me and takes a cup...and keeps it. I, giggling, tell her to drink it and them put the empty cup back in the center part of the tray. She does it and then says:

When are they bringing the OTHER drink?

I am laughing and Nana is laughing but we tell her: They aren't...we'll discuss this later.

Tay: OK, I thought there would be more.

Ballerina Police Officer!

Tay has long been saying she wants to be a Police Officer when she grows up. Really I have no idea why, so it is all her.

Today I told her:

Well, if you want to be a Police Officer you should take Karate or Jujitsu instead of Ballet.

Tay: No, I will still do Ballet.

AND be a Police Officer!

HAPPY 5th BIRTHDAY TAYLOR!

5

The Big Five.

She had a blast and we are not done. I will detail it tomorrow after I get more than 4 hours of sleep...at least the room looked good enough that the only negative thing she said was:

You could have done a few more Butterflies but it's good, I like it! You did a good job! Butterflies are OK, this is good. :)

She is a strong person, she is bright and charming and talks WAAAY too much. She is funny, and emotional, she shares well and watches out for the people she loves. She is more than a 5 year old girl, she is the reason I smile when I don't want to. She gives me hope that all will be well in the world. She is a good person, with a long way to go and I know she will enjoy the journey!

Happy Birthday 5 year old girl!

Asphalt is NOT a bad word.

Driving, as we usually are, and I say: Nice...asphalt trucks are making such a mess.

Tay: I didn't hear that.
Danny: Tay, Asphalt is NOT a bad word (me giggling in the driver seat).
Tay: It is.
Danny: No it isn't. The whole word is ASPHALT.
Me: Tay it isn't a bad word.
Tay: *I'M* not allowed to say ass.

I guess she does learn. :)

It's a bug...with legs

Tay has been playing downstairs in the chair/swing. I can hear her laughing. She stops and comes upstairs and tells me:

Mom, I found a bug. A bug with legs.

Well, Tay kill it.

MOM! No! I need a cup.

She gets a cup and disappears. When she comes back, sure enough, she has the aforementioned 'bug with legs' in a yellow cup.

I want to keep it.

I tell her: You can't keep it honey, it will die. Take it outside.

Tay: But I want to keep.

Tay, just take it outside.

She didn't do what I told her to do and a few minutes later she walks in holding a bug...with legs...in between her fingers. She says:

I have to flush this. It's gross.

And it's dead. It needs to be flushed. I am going to flush it. Gross.



AND WASH YOUR HANDS.

It's a bug...with legs!

Tay has been playing downstairs in the chair/swing. I can hear her laughing. She stops and comes upstairs and tells me:

Mom, I found a bug. A bug with legs.

Well, Tay kill it.

MOM! No! I need a cup.

She gets a cup and disappears. When she comes back, sure enough, she has the aforementioned 'bug with legs' in a yellow cup.

I want to keep it.

I tell her: You can't keep it honey, it will die. Take it outside.

Tay: But I want to keep.

Tay, just take it outside.

She didn't do what I told her to do and a few minutes later she walks in holding a bug...with legs...in between her fingers. She says:

I have to flush this. It's gross.

And it's dead. It needs to be flushed. I am going to flush it. Gross.



AND WASH YOUR HANDS.

Ah...the smell of...

We are sitting in bed. Bug is spinning...things. Tay is being weird and Daddy is sleeping through all of it.

Tay says:

Ah, the smell of victory.

I turn to her and she says: I farted.

She claims she learned it from her father...I see him giggling and not denying it.

Great.

Invisibility made easy

We were watching GHI (Ghost Hunters International), they were in Argentina at a hotel that supposedly was the place that Hitler and his fellas stayed once they escaped from the Bunker. Uh huh. So anyway...

They displayed a picture that they thought showed a man sitting on a bed. Tay saw it...I didn't. She turned to me:

That WAS a person on the bed. The person had already died or was made invisible.

Invisible huh?

Yah, they took an invisible potion. Genius' make them.

In her own words

i love Madagascar <3

Tay's Story #1

Tay wants to tell a story.

It begins with the show: Madagascar

They send Mort into the guy that goes Yack Yack and then Mort touches a kidney. And then Kowalski says:

I believe that's a kidney.

That's sexy

We were coloring Easter eggs Saturday night and we had all the colors going, green, yellow, pink, etc...

Tay was watching them very carefully and when she pulled out a particularly pretty color she exclaimed:

Oooh, that's sexy.

Hey Mom..

We are smack dab in the middle of morning rush. Bug is finishing breakfast, I am getting his book bag restocked and Tay is SUPPOSED to be getting dressed. It's snowing and she picks shorts.

I send her to fetch pants and I realize that Bug has left his brown shoe somewhere other than where it was supposed to be. I swear under my breath, get the Boy from his seat, clean him off, get his diaper changed, and throw his clothes on (NOT an easy task). I then set off to find his shoe before he is too late to group speech therapy.

I pass Tay in the hall and she says:

Hey Mom!

I stop and turn around: What Tay?

I was just remembering that I used to like snails.

Hectic over, giggle begins.

Tay: That's all.

The Dichotomy of Tay

Tay went to sleep last night, as a lot of 4 year olds do, clutching her toy(s).

What did she choose to keep her company you wonder?

A barbie doll and a rubber lizzard.

If you say No

Tay asked for a wooden, paint-able face-mask-stick-thing (when you see it - YOU can tell me what it is called, but until then...face-mask-stick-thing it is). It was a few dollars so I said: Why not?

Megan said she could use her paints on it when she got home. She meant LATER, as in TOMORROW. But Tay heard: WHEN YOU GET HOME.

We got home, she asked for the paints.

I said: Not right now, it's getting late and we need to get ready for bed, not paint.

She pouted, and whined, and pouted and whined and I sent her to her room.

When I released her from the prison I told her:

When I tell you do something, just do it. Do not question or argue, someday it may save your life.

She came downstairs, much calmer, and asked for a good night snack:

Mom, she said, can I have a good night snack? And if you say No I won't have one. If you say No I will just sit down. I really will.

Hey! That's ONE idea.

Tay knows her birthday is a mere 7 weeks away and she has been planning. She has a list of things she wants. And every new TV commercial is followed by: Can I have that for my birthday? So, Tay just came running in the room yelling;

Hey Mom! Here's another idea:
Barbie and the Mermaid would also be a good Easter present! What do ya think? Huh?

Me: LMAO!

Tay: I'm serious! Good for Easter (turns and leaves the room).

Little apples

If it offends anyone that I say words deemed less than appropriate for toddlers, stop reading cuz I said shit.

I was excited about finding something, can't remember what, but I said:

Oh my gosh. Glenn has been looking for this. When I bring this home he will shit little green apples.

Tay: Or red ones!

Dart Fingers

Tay wanted a Bow and Arrow for Valentines day. It was at Smith's...cheap and Daddy said No.

He got a Air Zone Cross Bow instead.

Tay's eyes lit up when she saw it and it has been on the agenda for 24 hours. The really fun part is that the arrows (Darts) fit on her fingers. Two fingers at a time that is.

So today Daddy is shooting Tay and she is picking up the darts and putting them on her fingers. When Daddy runs out of darts he takes them from her fingers and she exclaims:

Hey! I am not your bullet re-loader!

Presents of any kind are welcomed - immediately.

Glenn and I went out to pick up some Valentines presents. Tay gave us a list. Verbal of course, with detailed descriptions. We brought back dinner and she asked:

Are we gonna open our Valentines presents?

It took us ten minutes to get her to understand that we wouldn't be opening anything until tomorrow. She finally understood that it was 'after the night and the next morning' and then we can open them. Yes, we say. That is exactly it.

A few hours later I say:

I think I am going to bed.

Tay:

Ya, so we can get our Valentines presents.

She's got a million...today

I asked Glenn if he was up for driving me to the Train Show at Thanksgiving Point for a few minutes. He said:

Nope, Tay is gonna drive.

Tay: I can't drive, I'm 4. Duh!

Ya, 12 weeks

With the Grandparents and a few more visiting, Nana was calling people by other people's names. It happens. A bit. So, Megan says:

Yeah and it's not like you've know us a long time or anything.

Tay: Ya, like 12 weeks.
Megan: Nope Tay, a bit longer than that.
Tay: Ya, 6 weeks
Megan (giggling): Nope Tay you are 4 so...
Tay: 4 WEEKS!
Megan: LOL, 4 YEARS.
Tay: Uh huh.

Enough with the yelling.

I was giving Tay a little guff for not using her TAG reading system. The one she HAD to have for Christmas. So..she got it out and picked Ni Hao Kai Lan. She was going through the pages reading and then tapping on the items on the page. Apparently she tapped on something that the Tag system needed additional input for because I heard this:

Stop yelling at me! I got it!

No free hugs

Tay asked Daddy for a drink. Daddy asked her how much money she had. She said: 5 bucks.

Glenn: That's not enough...it's seven bucks.
Tay: Daaad!

Fast forward to a few hours later.

Daddy: Can I have a hug Tay?
Tay: How much money do you have?
Daddy: I don't have any money.
Tay: Well, I charge.

The Plane to Brazil

Mom, Tay, Bug and I were at the airport waiting for Megan's plane to make its appearance. A Southwest airplane took off close enough that we all saw it really well and Mom commented:

Oh look Tay, I used to fly Southwest quite a bit. I wonder where that plane is going.

Tay, without hesitation says: South America.

Mom and I giggle. Tay says indignantly: I'm serious.