Tay-isms

I'd do anything for you...except....

2011-10-14T12:11:00.003-06:00

Tay, Bug and I are home and I need to take Tay to get some bloodwork (allergies) and to look at a couple of dresses for the Epilepsy Association of Utah Gala. She already ordered one but I want to make sure she really loves it.

So I ask her to at least try on the dresses.

She says: I love that black dress. Are they like that?

Me: No, they are white and ivory but you should at least try them on.

Tay: Ok, Mom. I will do anything for you.

PAUSE

Except when Dad is around.

GIGGLE (me)

When Dad is around, I won't do ANYTHING. Only when he isn't here, OK?

It's all good

2011-08-24T16:05:00.001-06:00

Daddy brought home a Kashi bar from San Fransisco and gave it to Tay. She gladly ate it and, after a little bit, Daddy asked:

So, how is it?

Tay: I am getting a little worried about the black stuff in this.

Dad: (and Mom giggling) Maybe its Rabbit poops...or rat.

Tay: Ew.

Pause. Longer pause.

Tay: It's all good. They're raisins.

Mom!

2011-08-01T10:18:00.001-06:00

'I have a way wiggly tooth!'

Yep, it's true, she does. What's the going rate for teeth these days?

Topless

2011-07-22T12:54:00.003-06:00

It has come to our attention that my Land Cruiser sucks too much gasoline (ya, we have known that since we bought it, but we both wanted a Cruiser for such a long time we don't care...much). So we are looking at cars with better gas mileage for me to run around in.

Daddy knows I want an FJ Cruiser but they don't get much better mileage. Still, he sent me a link to one with an excellent price.

I showed Tay.

What do you think of this? Can I have it?

Tay: Only if the top comes off.

I think she wants a Convertible. I hope.

The secret to invicibilty.

2011-07-08T23:37:00.001-06:00

Daddy and Tay have been doing almost nightly Segway rides. They go down a bike path, stop at the park, swing for a bit and then, come home,

Swing really means Daddy pushes her.

Until tonight.

She was swinging on her own.

As always, she humbly exclaimed:

Daddy! I can swing on my own! I am...invincible.

(We really are working on the humility part. But check off the swinging!)

In anticipation.

2011-06-01T19:03:00.001-06:00

Tay walks over to my bedside drawer, opens it and extracts a bandaid.

Me: What happened?

Tay: My thumb has a cut on it and I *think* it's gonna bleed soon.

Popcorn and a Movie

2011-04-07T17:57:00.002-06:00

Me: Tay, you wanna watch a movie?

Tay: Sure. Let's turn out the lights. Movies are better in the dark.

Me: Ok. What movie do you want to watch?

Tay: Mmmmmm....Tangled.

Grabs some popcorn...movie keys up.

Tay: I hate the end when he gets stabbed. He gets stabbed in the stomach...or the back.

Pause.

Tay: In the kidney. He gets stabbed in the kidney. Yah, that's it. The kidney.

On a roll

2011-03-01T22:06:00.003-07:00

Tay has been skipping lunch. She is too excited to play outside with her friends so she 'forgets'. I PAY for her lunch so we are putting a value on her 'forgetfulness' and every few days I ask about her lunch.

She lied once or twice and the punishment was swift. I think we are passed that point. She better hope we are passed that point.

So today went like...

Me: How was school? Did you have fun and learn lots?

Tay: Uh huh. I was really good.

Me: Did you eat lunch?

Tay: They weren't serving Breakfast.

Me:??? What?

Tay: I asked and he said they weren't serving Breakfast and to go to class.

Me: Giggle. I know honey, you got there an hour and half late, I assume breakfast was over. DID...YOU...HAVE...LUNCH?

Tay: Uh huh.

PAUSE

Me: What did you have?

Tay: Turkey. I forget the name for Turkey Roll....oh! It's Turkey Roll. Duh.

Me: Giggle. Was it good?

Tay: No.

Me: Giggle. But you ate it anyway?

Tay: Yep. We had other things too and I drank all my chocolate milk!

Me: Well, when you have something at school that you like just tell me and we will buy some for home ok?

Tay: Ok....but they haven't had anything I like.

Me: Giggle. I thought you liked the chocolate milk.

Tay: Oh yeah, that...buy lots of that.

Mom, put this on my blog.

2011-01-24T11:30:00.002-07:00

Tay saw this on Facebook and she asked me to put it on her blog since it was so funny.

Enjoy.

Just wait for it....

2010-11-03T20:16:00.001-06:00

We picked Daddy up from the airport and I hear:

Daddy, I have some songs to sing for you.

Glenn: Do any of them have anything to do with bellybuttons?

Tay: No they don't.....but we'll get to that later.

Gimme that!

2010-10-05T10:27:00.002-06:00

Commercial.

Go Go My Walking Pup comes on, all walking and stuff. And Tay says:

Ohhhh!!! I want that!

I look up. Oh dear heaven, not really? She doesn't play with that Creepy Cat she got for Christmas...besides Cat's and Dog's don't usually get along (wouldn't that be a kick, if Hasbro built that into the logic? Cat hisses, Dog barks and jumps snapping, Cat hisses. Dog wets itself.)

Tay says:

It won't poop.

I say: Uh huh I know.

She says: Or pee.

Long pause....

It won't poop or pee.

Seriously, I need that.

First Day of Kindergarten!

2010-09-01T20:57:00.010-06:00

Tay has been extremely excited to go to Kindergarten, of course, she wants to skip it and go to 1st grade too. So, we got her all ready, she picked out her dress, I did her hair and we walked to the Bus Stop.

While we were there I took a half a million pictures or so and she POSED for almost all of them. When I say pose...I mean pose, not just stood still and put a hand on a hip, no no no, she pulled faces and everything. Well, see for yourself:

And we waited, but the bus was late. Uh Oh. Sign of things to come?

Eventually, she got on the bus and headed away to her first day of Kindergarten. I didn't cry, not even misty-eyed but I DID feel old. I know she is well adjusted to new things and anxious to be her own person. She told me, the night before, that I should NOT go with her to school. That I should NOT even think about it.

So I didn't.

But I still had to go to school and prove to them that she was all inoculated and indoctrinated and stuff. So I waited a half hour and then headed over.

When I got there, Darla said: I have a story for you.

I thought: 30 minutes and there are already stories? Oh dear heaven.

She said that Taylor came into the office and wasn't sure where her class was. There was a nice lady that was walking with her and Darla assumed it was Mom (she had forgotten who belonged with whom and they both did have blond hair). So, Darla tells Tay (thinking that Mom is listening too but wants to let Tay feel like she is a big girl and can take care of herself) that she is in room 156 and it's down this hall and to the left.

Tay says OK and walks out.

When the woman did not follow, Darla asked: Aren't you going to go with her?

The woman responded: Not her Mom.

So Darla and the Woman watch Tay walk down the hall and make the turn and saw that she had gotten almost to her classroom when her teacher walked out and they all made sure she got to class.

Darla said she was impressed that Tay was just very matter-of-fact about it and was completely confident she could do it on her own.

I said: Yeah, it sucks. :)

So Tay had an uneventful day, as far as I know, and Danny and I walked down to pick her up. The bus showed up:

But Tay did NOT get off.

I swore and walked back home to get my phone. I left Danny there in case she showed up and by the time I called the school and got into the car I saw them walking up the street. Dang it all I missed the shot of her getting off the bus. Well, out of the car will have to do:

She said she had a good time and showed me what she brought home. She also said she needed a backpack so we went, later, and bought one.

She is in Kindergarten now and her life is going to be a lot different. She will be opened up to new friendships, a world of information, cruelty, knowledge and I pray she will be strong enough to take it all in and use it to find her own path. She is already an amazing little girl and today is her first step in many she will take toward her personal development. We will encourage her and support her, while trying not to shield her. We will ensure that she has it easier than we did, because that's what parents do.

Have a great second day Tay! I love you!

Zombies!

2010-06-18T10:31:00.003-06:00

Out of the blue:

Molotov's kill zombies.

Me: Molotov's? Really?

Yep, and there's also fire bombs. But don't watch me.

So I am not watching...I'm afraid of Molotov's.

Mom's Job

2010-05-23T12:16:00.000-06:00

Nana bought Tay some walkie talkies. Not just any 'ol walkie talkies...these looked like little cell phones. Oh boy.

We were driving home from Nana's and Tay broke them out, handed me one and stated talking to me, from the backseat.

I hear all sorts of things and then she asks a question. I answer and she says:

Thanks for teaching me that.

I push the button and say: It's my job.

I hear:

No it isn't, your job is to boss us around.

Mom, it's warm.

2010-05-20T17:27:00.004-06:00

We have problems with chocolate Popsicles. Tay loves them. She tried to eat them in lieu of other food so after I turned her down for the third time today because she didn't eat the prepared food she said:

OK.

????

She put it back and disappeared into my bedroom to watch Sponge Bob.

A few minutes later (commercial most likely) she comes in a says:

You know, Mom, it's warm. I am warm. (fans herself with her hand)

And Popsicles are really good at cooling you off.

I'm serious.

Apparently I was laughing out loud.

Food and Drink

2010-05-09T15:06:00.003-06:00

We don't go to church much, it's tough with Bug. And unless you have met him, and spent a day with him, you would think it was a feeble excuse but it isn't. The last time we took him, he spent the time banging anything he could find on the back of the pew, when he wasn't doing that he was arching his back trying to get away and screaming at the top of his lungs. No comments, please, about just don't let him get away with it...we have no choice about it.

SO...we take Tay to church. She has been before but for some reason, she has gone dumb about it.

We are awaiting the sacrament and she says:

Hey! We get Food and Drink.

Me: Kinda. Be quiet.

After the bread she says:

When are they bringing the drink?

Me: In a minute...be quiet.

They bring the water...she looks at it, looks at me and takes a cup...and keeps it. I, giggling, tell her to drink it and them put the empty cup back in the center part of the tray. She does it and then says:

When are they bringing the OTHER drink?

I am laughing and Nana is laughing but we tell her: They aren't...we'll discuss this later.

Tay: OK, I thought there would be more.

Ballerina Police Officer!

2010-05-06T10:27:00.002-06:00

Tay has long been saying she wants to be a Police Officer when she grows up. Really I have no idea why, so it is all her.

Today I told her:

Well, if you want to be a Police Officer you should take Karate or Jujitsu instead of Ballet.

Tay: No, I will still do Ballet.

AND be a Police Officer!

HAPPY 5th BIRTHDAY TAYLOR!

2010-04-28T21:21:00.003-06:00

5

The Big Five.

She had a blast and we are not done. I will detail it tomorrow after I get more than 4 hours of sleep...at least the room looked good enough that the only negative thing she said was:

You could have done a few more Butterflies but it's good, I like it! You did a good job! Butterflies are OK, this is good. :)

She is a strong person, she is bright and charming and talks WAAAY too much. She is funny, and emotional, she shares well and watches out for the people she loves. She is more than a 5 year old girl, she is the reason I smile when I don't want to. She gives me hope that all will be well in the world. She is a good person, with a long way to go and I know she will enjoy the journey!

Happy Birthday 5 year old girl!

Asphalt is NOT a bad word.

2010-04-20T14:53:00.003-06:00

Driving, as we usually are, and I say: Nice...asphalt trucks are making such a mess.

Tay: I didn't hear that.
Danny: Tay, Asphalt is NOT a bad word (me giggling in the driver seat).
Tay: It is.
Danny: No it isn't. The whole word is ASPHALT.
Me: Tay it isn't a bad word.
Tay: *I'M* not allowed to say ass.

I guess she does learn. :)

It's a bug...with legs

2010-04-08T16:51:00.001-06:00

Tay has been playing downstairs in the chair/swing. I can hear her laughing. She stops and comes upstairs and tells me:

Mom, I found a bug. A bug with legs.

Well, Tay kill it.

MOM! No! I need a cup.

She gets a cup and disappears. When she comes back, sure enough, she has the aforementioned 'bug with legs' in a yellow cup.

I want to keep it.

I tell her: You can't keep it honey, it will die. Take it outside.

Tay: But I want to keep.

Tay, just take it outside.

She didn't do what I told her to do and a few minutes later she walks in holding a bug...with legs...in between her fingers. She says:

I have to flush this. It's gross.

And it's dead. It needs to be flushed. I am going to flush it. Gross.

AND WASH YOUR HANDS.

Ah...the smell of...

2010-04-07T22:01:00.002-06:00

We are sitting in bed. Bug is spinning...things. Tay is being weird and Daddy is sleeping through all of it.

Tay says:

Ah, the smell of victory.

I turn to her and she says: I farted.

She claims she learned it from her father...I see him giggling and not denying it.

Great.

Invisibility made easy

2010-04-07T16:09:00.002-06:00

We were watching GHI (Ghost Hunters International), they were in Argentina at a hotel that supposedly was the place that Hitler and his fellas stayed once they escaped from the Bunker. Uh huh. So anyway...

They displayed a picture that they thought showed a man sitting on a bed. Tay saw it...I didn't. She turned to me:

That WAS a person on the bed. The person had already died or was made invisible.

Invisible huh?

Yah, they took an invisible potion. Genius' make them.

In her own words

2010-04-07T10:11:00.002-06:00

i love Madagascar <3

Tay's Story #1

2010-04-07T10:09:00.002-06:00

Tay wants to tell a story.

It begins with the show: Madagascar

They send Mort into the guy that goes Yack Yack and then Mort touches a kidney. And then Kowalski says:

I believe that's a kidney.

That's sexy

2010-04-05T09:55:00.002-06:00

We were coloring Easter eggs Saturday night and we had all the colors going, green, yellow, pink, etc...

Tay was watching them very carefully and when she pulled out a particularly pretty color she exclaimed:

Oooh, that's sexy.

Hey Mom..

2010-03-31T10:13:00.003-06:00

We are smack dab in the middle of morning rush. Bug is finishing breakfast, I am getting his book bag restocked and Tay is SUPPOSED to be getting dressed. It's snowing and she picks shorts.

I send her to fetch pants and I realize that Bug has left his brown shoe somewhere other than where it was supposed to be. I swear under my breath, get the Boy from his seat, clean him off, get his diaper changed, and throw his clothes on (NOT an easy task). I then set off to find his shoe before he is too late to group speech therapy.

I pass Tay in the hall and she says:

Hey Mom!

I stop and turn around: What Tay?

I was just remembering that I used to like snails.

Hectic over, giggle begins.

Tay: That's all.

The Dichotomy of Tay

2010-03-31T08:46:00.002-06:00

Tay went to sleep last night, as a lot of 4 year olds do, clutching her toy(s).

What did she choose to keep her company you wonder?

A barbie doll and a rubber lizzard.

If you say No

2010-03-27T22:01:00.004-06:00

Tay asked for a wooden, paint-able face-mask-stick-thing (when you see it - YOU can tell me what it is called, but until then...face-mask-stick-thing it is). It was a few dollars so I said: Why not?

Megan said she could use her paints on it when she got home. She meant LATER, as in TOMORROW. But Tay heard: WHEN YOU GET HOME.

We got home, she asked for the paints.

I said: Not right now, it's getting late and we need to get ready for bed, not paint.

She pouted, and whined, and pouted and whined and I sent her to her room.

When I released her from the prison I told her:

When I tell you do something, just do it. Do not question or argue, someday it may save your life.

She came downstairs, much calmer, and asked for a good night snack:

Mom, she said, can I have a good night snack? And if you say No I won't have one. If you say No I will just sit down. I really will.

Hey! That's ONE idea.

2010-03-10T10:26:00.005-07:00

Tay knows her birthday is a mere 7 weeks away and she has been planning. She has a list of things she wants. And every new TV commercial is followed by: Can I have that for my birthday? So, Tay just came running in the room yelling;

Hey Mom! Here's another idea:
Barbie and the Mermaid would also be a good Easter present! What do ya think? Huh?

Me: LMAO!

Tay: I'm serious! Good for Easter (turns and leaves the room).

Little apples

2010-03-05T15:34:00.003-07:00

If it offends anyone that I say words deemed less than appropriate for toddlers, stop reading cuz I said shit.

I was excited about finding something, can't remember what, but I said:

Oh my gosh. Glenn has been looking for this. When I bring this home he will shit little green apples.

Tay: Or red ones!

Dart Fingers

2010-02-15T10:44:00.022-07:00

Tay wanted a Bow and Arrow for Valentines day. It was at Smith's...cheap and Daddy said No.

He got a Air Zone Cross Bow instead.

Tay's eyes lit up when she saw it and it has been on the agenda for 24 hours. The really fun part is that the arrows (Darts) fit on her fingers. Two fingers at a time that is.

So today Daddy is shooting Tay and she is picking up the darts and putting them on her fingers. When Daddy runs out of darts he takes them from her fingers and she exclaims:

Hey! I am not your bullet re-loader!

Presents of any kind are welcomed - immediately.

2010-02-13T21:40:00.004-07:00

Glenn and I went out to pick up some Valentines presents. Tay gave us a list. Verbal of course, with detailed descriptions. We brought back dinner and she asked:

Are we gonna open our Valentines presents?

It took us ten minutes to get her to understand that we wouldn't be opening anything until tomorrow. She finally understood that it was 'after the night and the next morning' and then we can open them. Yes, we say. That is exactly it.

A few hours later I say:

I think I am going to bed.

Tay:

Ya, so we can get our Valentines presents.

She's got a million...today

2010-01-23T12:16:00.003-07:00

I asked Glenn if he was up for driving me to the Train Show at Thanksgiving Point for a few minutes. He said:

Nope, Tay is gonna drive.

Tay: I can't drive, I'm 4. Duh!

Ya, 12 weeks

2010-01-23T12:02:00.002-07:00

With the Grandparents and a few more visiting, Nana was calling people by other people's names. It happens. A bit. So, Megan says:

Yeah and it's not like you've know us a long time or anything.

Tay: Ya, like 12 weeks.
Megan: Nope Tay, a bit longer than that.
Tay: Ya, 6 weeks
Megan (giggling): Nope Tay you are 4 so...
Tay: 4 WEEKS!
Megan: LOL, 4 YEARS.
Tay: Uh huh.

Enough with the yelling.

2010-01-21T10:33:00.003-07:00

I was giving Tay a little guff for not using her TAG reading system. The one she HAD to have for Christmas. So..she got it out and picked Ni Hao Kai Lan. She was going through the pages reading and then tapping on the items on the page. Apparently she tapped on something that the Tag system needed additional input for because I heard this:

Stop yelling at me! I got it!

No free hugs

2010-01-09T13:24:00.002-07:00

Tay asked Daddy for a drink. Daddy asked her how much money she had. She said: 5 bucks.

Glenn: That's not enough...it's seven bucks.
Tay: Daaad!

Fast forward to a few hours later.

Daddy: Can I have a hug Tay?
Tay: How much money do you have?
Daddy: I don't have any money.
Tay: Well, I charge.

The Plane to Brazil

2010-01-03T10:28:00.002-07:00

Mom, Tay, Bug and I were at the airport waiting for Megan's plane to make its appearance. A Southwest airplane took off close enough that we all saw it really well and Mom commented:

Oh look Tay, I used to fly Southwest quite a bit. I wonder where that plane is going.

Tay, without hesitation says: South America.

Mom and I giggle. Tay says indignantly: I'm serious.

The Guy With The Gun

2009-11-27T12:36:00.010-07:00

Tay was drawing pictures for everyone. Grandpa got a flower, Grandma got a flower, Megan got a angry man with a gun. M'kay.

So she proudly walks it over to Megan and hands it to her. Megan shows me the picture and comments

My guy has eyelashes.

Tay: Yep, they're guylashes.

Yeah...and...

2009-11-20T08:56:00.000-07:00

We were setting up Taylor's room, finally, and we hung her netting over the bed. Bug immediately jumped on the bed and began to play with it. He wrapped himself up in it and giggled with immense joy. He would NOT leave it alone. It, apparently, was the funnest thing EVER!

So later, I asked Tay what we should get for Buddy's birthday in a couple weeks.

Tay said: A big red truck. Then he could spin the wheels!

I said: What about a tent for over his bed? He liked your net so much I bet he would love to have a bed tent to play under.

Tay: Yeah, and then we could get him another red truck so he can have TWO!

Da Sniffles

2009-11-15T10:43:00.001-07:00

Mom, Lego Batman makes my sniffles go away.

Me: Well you better play then.

Mom, if no one is in here to watch me, the sniffles get worse.

Throat

2009-11-04T14:38:00.002-07:00

Tay snuck a piece of gum before Ballet with the promise to spit it out BEFORE class. *I* was eating Diam chocolates. Of course Tay wanted some.

Oh darn, you have gum.

I hear and SEE....GULP!

Tay, you DID NOT swallow your gum.

She grins and says:

I have a big throat ya know.

Starts with S

2009-10-25T21:02:00.003-06:00

In the car, as we almost always are, and we are doing words that start with the letter S because "they taught me that at my school".

We do: store, sign, spit (quickly followed by: but don't), speed, Sizzler, silly and then Daddy says SNOT!

Tay responds: let's not use snot..I don't like that.

Message for you sir

2009-09-25T08:22:00.003-06:00

Laying in bed, trying to wake up, cuddling with a sick boy and watching SpongeBob. Tay is sitting on the end of the bed playing with a piece of paper (she HAS toys, I didn't say: here use your imagination) when suddenly she throws it on my lap saying:

Zing! Message for you.

Then: I didn't throw it, you didn't see me throw it..it just showed up. Read it!

I don't negotiate with terrorists

2009-09-15T20:07:00.003-06:00

Tay wanted to go outside to help run-off the Israeli Solicitor. I told her:

No, stay here.

She walked over to my shoes and said:
If you don't let me go outside I will destroy your shoe.

I told her: I don't negotiate with terrorists.

Tay: Hmph!

And walked upstairs to get dressed.

Brrr...

2009-09-04T10:47:00.003-06:00

I have been ill the last few days. Because of it, and my sheer laziness, the children have had the run of the house. BIG mistake. There is a lot that needs to be cleaned.

I asked Tay to pick up the toys in the living room and I would vacuum. What ensued was a long, drawn out negotiation, and although she is good, I am better. I have the: Because I am the Mom trump card. So she began to pick up. Very little, but at least she started.

A few minutes later, an almost naked Taylor walks into my bedroom, arms across her chest, shivering and says:

Mom, I'm getting too cold of cleaning up.

Wrong

2009-09-01T10:20:00.000-06:00

Testing out the new PS3, Glenn was playing videos. Tay was watching the video for Wrong by Depeche Mode.

Glenn said: We went to see them in concert ya know?
Tay: HEY! I wanted to go!
Glenn: Maybe when you get older.
Tay: Ya, like when I am 5.

Grandma does it better

2009-08-11T10:09:00.002-06:00

Papa likes Toaster Strudel. Has since they first released them for public consumption. I know this, Mom knows this, every one knows this. There is almost always some in any freezer where Dad stays. So I bought some last night and he made some this morning.

Tay woke up, gave me a hug and cuddle and Dad sat down in the chair. Tay said: Papa you have to sit by us on the couch.

She said this because 1) she loves her Papa AND 2) He had Toaster Strudel. She knows Papa is generous and I am sure was counting on sharing.

So Papa shared. And then he asked:

See, it's better than Grandma's isn't it?

Tay: No.

Don't ask if you can't handle the answer. Papa and I laughed.

What seatbelt?

2009-08-02T16:01:00.003-06:00

We're riding in the car, the Cruiser (this is a kinda important fact) and Papa and Nana say to Taylor: Why are you touching that? I look back and she is standing in the third row leaning over the second. I think: she ain't doing that with her seatbelt ON.

Me: Tay! Why are you standing?
Tay: Huh?
Me: Put your seatbelt on.
Tay: But it's invisible.

Car erupts with laughter.

Me: Invisible huh?
Tay: Yep.
Glenn: Put the visible one. I can't tell the Officer to look at the invisble one, we will all go to jail. Can you imagine? Yes, Officer, I KNOW it LOOKS like she isn't wearing one, that's only because we got the invisible ones.

Tay put on her visible one, just for Daddy and the Policeman.

You know why I love you?

2009-07-15T09:30:00.003-06:00

We spent the weekend at Mom and Dad's. Went to two Ogden Raptor's game (lost the first, won the second) and did a few other things. We woke up Sunday morning and I heard:

Mom, the sun is up.

Me: Yes, Tay it came up again.
Tay: You know why I love you Mom?
Me: Why honey?
Tay: I love you because the sun came up.

Negotiation

2009-07-06T10:28:00.003-06:00

It was a long day. We were in bed getting ready to sleep. Tay was watching Oobi. If you haven't had that pleasure it's on Noggin. I suggest you TiVo it at least once.

So I say:

Tay, I am gonna turn the channel. We are done with Oobi okay?

Tay: Let's pretend you can't find the remote.

Soccer..no...ballet

2009-06-29T11:48:00.004-06:00

Tay can't decide if she wants to try Soccer (I am trying to be Switzerland and remain completely neutral all the while smuggling those paintings in the guise of REAL Salt Lake games) or if she wants 'Ballerina lessons'. Her Aunt Cheryl just assumes she will be playing soccer and has been overtly feeding her desire. She bought her two soccer balls, one for the REAL team to sign, and one to play with, even though I had already bought her a size 3..in pink months earlier. She also has shin guards now, thanks Aunt Cheryl. We took her to the REAL / Toronto game on Saturday. It was great! Brett went with us and Tay spent the time making friends. No lie. The guy in front of us high 5'd her a few times for her screaming: GO RED TEAM! (she can't say REE AWL, or at least she won't try.)

When the crowd would groan, Tay would groan. When REAL scored and the place went wild, Tay went wild. She screamed at the top of her lungs which prompted the people in front of us and in front of them to turn around and smile at her. Brett asked: Was that her? I nodded. He said: Oh my. And giggled. She's loud. I asked her if she wanted to play and she jumped up and down: Yes! And I smiled.

When Cheryl took her to get the ball signed, she waited in line and watched all the people kicking around. Once the ball was signed...she bounced it. Yep, like a basketball. Wouldn't kick it, bounced it. I caught the REAL players watching her and smiling. So I think, although she looks REALLY cute in the outfit, we will wait a little longer. THAT and she was showing me how Ballerina's point their toes in cleats on the way home.

Interesting place for a headache

2009-06-24T13:20:00.003-06:00

Tay has been impatiently waiting to go over to the neighbors. They are going swimming today. Hopefully. I have been trying to clean and making lunch all with her asking if it's time yet. I told her she had to eat lunch and then she could go over. She sits down gleefully to eat. Takes a few bites and says:

Whew, I am full.

Me: Eat a little more please, I don't for one second believe you are full.
Tay: But my brother needs more food. I will give him mine.
Me: No. Eat.
Tay: I think my brother wants some of my food.
Me: Tay, eat.

Long pause.

Tay: My tummy has a headache, it can't eat anymore.

Wrong shoes

2009-06-18T11:17:00.002-06:00

Raining. (I'm painting the picture.)

Dark.
Driving.
Drives though a DEEP puddle and water sprays all around us.

Tay: This is why we wear shoes with toes.

Pause.

Tay: See, Nana, you wore the wrong shoes. No toes. You wore sandles. Those are the wrong shoes cuz it's raining.

Nana: I know, thanks.

Me: Giggle giggle giggle.

I guess the grass is getting long.

2009-06-16T10:51:00.004-06:00

Tay and 'The Boys' from next door came in and asked: Can we borrow the lawnmower? Now, before you get concerned, they were asking for their Mother. I said sure and brought it out to them. They took it next door.

I don't know what was playing out but the next thing I hear is the front door opening. I turn to see Tay walking down the hallway, pouting. REALLY pouting.

Me: What's wrong?
Tay: The Boys won't let me start the Mowlawner.
Me: The Mowlawner?
Tay: Yes! And I told them to let me but they won't.
Me: Well, I think that their Mom should do it.
Tay: Daddy let me
Me: Daddy is not out there so leave it to Josie
Tay (still pouting in a long skirt and walking toward the door): I never get to work the Mowlawner.

What's a little rain?

2009-06-14T22:05:00.004-06:00

Without a child who wants to play in it? In the kitchen I hear:

Mom I am going to go outside with my rainbrella.

Rainbrella? It does make more sense doesn't it? And this is what I see:

She is even wearing her swim top.

For the next little while...rainbrella is the word.

Don't say that Mom

2009-06-10T19:42:00.000-06:00

We were driving. We drive a lot. I was in my lane and the traffic ahead of me was slowing down, so I slowed down. Now, my lane also had an on-ramp/off-ramp situation going on. Stupid layout as far as I am concerned and here's why:

There was a 'guy' merging onto the freeway...not paying attention to what was ahead of him just whether or not he could speed up fast enough to beat the guy coming up on me in the outside lane. He did NOT see that everyone, including myself, was slowing down. That's right he sped up and started to merge behind me too quickly. I can't tell you how close he was to us because I could only see the top of his hood and not a bumper! I sped up a little (NOTE: Gentlemen, this is WHY you leave escape room of at least one car in front of you, in case you have to move up out of 'someones' way.) and as I was doing so he barely made it past me. I literally braced for impact and this escaped my lips:

Oh crap! What an ass.

Tay: Hey! You can't say asshole Mom.
Me: I didn't say asshole Tay I said ass. He was being stupid and reckless and I called him an ass.
Tay: Don't say asshole Mom.
Me: I didn't honey.
Tay: Well don't say it anyway.